Halloween Jokes
Why did the other kids have to let the vampire play baseball?
It was his bat.
What is as sharp as a vampires fang?
His other fang.
Why did the vampire quit the baseball team?
They would only let him be BAT boy!
Why didn’t Dracula get married?
He never met a nice Ghoul!
What does a vampire fear most?
Tooth decay
What is Transylvania?
Dracula’s terror-tory
Where does Dracula water ski?
On Lake Erie
What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and goes quack-quack?
Count Duckula
What kind of boat pulls Dracula when he water skis?
A blood vessel
Where did the vampire open his savings account?
At a blood bank
Why couldn’t Dracula’s wife get to sleep?
Because of his coffin
How does a witch tell time?
She looks at her witch watch.
Why don’t witches like to ride their brooms when they’re angry?
They’re afraid of flying off the handle!
What do witches use on their hair?
Scare spray
Why did the witches’ team lose the baseball game?
Their bats flew away
What would you find on a haunted beach?
A sand witch.
What did the bat say to the witch’s hat?
You go on ahead. I’ll hang around for a while.
What does the Coven’s softball team do on Halloween?
They practice pitchcraft.
What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Spelling!
What’s a haunted chicken?
A poultry-geist
What do you call a ghost in a torn sheet?
A holy terror.
What did the little ghost have in his rock collection?
Tombstones
Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
Dayscare centers
What kind of mistakes do spooks make?
Boo boos
Where do ghosts mail their letters?
At the ghost office
Why did the ghost cross the road?
To get to “THE OTHER SIDE”
What do you call a ghost with a broken leg?
Hoblin’ Goblin.
What happens when a ghost gets lost in a fog?
He’s mist
What do you call a roomful of ghosts?
A bunch of boo-boos.
What’s a ghoul’s favorite game?
Hide-And-Go-Shriek!
Why did the ghost starch her sheet?
She wanted everyone to be scared stiff.
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