Why did the other kids have to let the vampire play baseball?
It was his bat.

What is as sharp as a vampires fang?
His other fang.
Click here to read more Halloween Jokes... (355 words, estimated 1:25 mins reading time)

“I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was “You’ll never find anyone like me again!” I’m thinking, “I should hope not! If I don’t want you, why would I want someone like you.””
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Of all the friends I’ve ever met. Your the one I won’t forget. And if I die before you do, I’ll go to heaven and wait for you.
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When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s s3xual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s $3.95 per minute.

Conserve toilet paper, use both sides.
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Caught Sleeping Together
Boy1:Meet my wife Tina
Boy2.Oh! I know her
Boy1:How?
Boy2:v were caught sleeping together
Boy1:What the hell?
Boy2.during lecture in maths class
Click here to read more Short Text Messages... (108 words, estimated 26 secs reading time)